What is wrong with our children these days?
I was sitting here thinking...over a year ago I ran around my house and got everything and did everything for my kids. They barked, and I would come. I think I felt guilty for never being able to be with them when I was working for all of those years. I was trying to make up for it or something. It could have been my divorce too. I wanted to make sure they were dealing with everything okay, and they had what they needed. But then I realized, if I am always doing everything for them...what are they learning? How am I preparing them for society? Well...the sad truth is I wasn't preparing them for anything, but failure. I was spoiling them and teaching them nothing really.
At that moment I made a change. I started thinking about how I was brought up. Children were not suppose to speak until they were spoken to, we always said please and thank you, we had multiple chores and we didn't get paid for them, we respected adults and called them Mr. Jones or Mrs. Cannon. That is what was expected of us. I realized that my kids were taking advantage of me, and I was letting them. This was not right.
So I changed! I sat my kids down and we talked about the new rules, the new chores, and most importantly the importance of respect for all adults. They said "well what do we get?" I was shocked and horrified! I said "you get the satisfaction of knowing you did something to help someone or knowing you did something to help keep our house clean..." That is it. It has been a tough transition, but it is working. As hard as it is, we just keep on them every day. We keep reinforcing the rules and we don't back down on the chores. Eventually it becomes habit, and they will acquire skills that will help them as they grow.
So, I have had my own battles, but what frightens me more is the amount of parents who do not realize what they are not doing to help their kids. Some of them are products of our society and others are too busy or just don't care. It is scary.
My daughter asked 10 of her friends at school a question. These are 9 and 10 year old kids. She said "Do you make your bed every morning?" 7 out of 10 of them said "NO, my Mom does it for me." Then my daughter asked, "Do you have to do other chores?" 6 out of 10 of them said "No, my Mom does everything." So we are talking about kids who are perfectly capable of doing chores, but no one tells them to do it.
What happened to the old days, when I was growing up? Mind you, I am in my late 30's but still! I cleaned my room, the bathroom, made my bed every day, helped with the dishes and dinner. I learned how to be responsible for something and the importance of taking care of what you have.
I don't see that these days. Parents are so scared of not being PC in this stupid PC world we live in that they forget all of the basic core values. Parents need to teach kids how to earn a dollar, they need to teach them how to appreciate what they have, they need to teach them to think for themselves, to be responsible, and to be respectful. I see kids every day who are dis-respectful, have no consequences, and really just don't care. We can't blame it all on them...where did they learn or not learn these so called traits. Maybe we should look in the mirror.
At that moment I made a change. I started thinking about how I was brought up. Children were not suppose to speak until they were spoken to, we always said please and thank you, we had multiple chores and we didn't get paid for them, we respected adults and called them Mr. Jones or Mrs. Cannon. That is what was expected of us. I realized that my kids were taking advantage of me, and I was letting them. This was not right.
So I changed! I sat my kids down and we talked about the new rules, the new chores, and most importantly the importance of respect for all adults. They said "well what do we get?" I was shocked and horrified! I said "you get the satisfaction of knowing you did something to help someone or knowing you did something to help keep our house clean..." That is it. It has been a tough transition, but it is working. As hard as it is, we just keep on them every day. We keep reinforcing the rules and we don't back down on the chores. Eventually it becomes habit, and they will acquire skills that will help them as they grow.
So, I have had my own battles, but what frightens me more is the amount of parents who do not realize what they are not doing to help their kids. Some of them are products of our society and others are too busy or just don't care. It is scary.
My daughter asked 10 of her friends at school a question. These are 9 and 10 year old kids. She said "Do you make your bed every morning?" 7 out of 10 of them said "NO, my Mom does it for me." Then my daughter asked, "Do you have to do other chores?" 6 out of 10 of them said "No, my Mom does everything." So we are talking about kids who are perfectly capable of doing chores, but no one tells them to do it.
What happened to the old days, when I was growing up? Mind you, I am in my late 30's but still! I cleaned my room, the bathroom, made my bed every day, helped with the dishes and dinner. I learned how to be responsible for something and the importance of taking care of what you have.
I don't see that these days. Parents are so scared of not being PC in this stupid PC world we live in that they forget all of the basic core values. Parents need to teach kids how to earn a dollar, they need to teach them how to appreciate what they have, they need to teach them to think for themselves, to be responsible, and to be respectful. I see kids every day who are dis-respectful, have no consequences, and really just don't care. We can't blame it all on them...where did they learn or not learn these so called traits. Maybe we should look in the mirror.
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